Travel Log: Savannah
I said in a previous entry that God had spoken to me through reality television before. This tends to astound me even more considering the small amount of time I spend with television in general, let alone reality tv. This time was during So You Think You Can Dance, Season 8, the finale episode. This season had a lot of very heavy emotional dances dealing with broken relationships. This is a subject I have been faced with more than once, and while previously a subject of brokenness it is now a subject of release and redemption into a love story with God I’d never known this deeply until this past year.
But this is not just truth over me, I believe. So, I will share it as part of the journey.
I myself have seen so much beautiful redemption, and have felt so free of the lies spoken over me from former chapters of stories. Yet, here I sat weeks ago, watching, crying, being released further. It was just God and I on my couch. The word “enough” came into view in my mind. Then I put my pen to the paper and let it all go.
If you connect to this, then read it for you. Be free.
I didn’t realize that I was still suffering over this. Not good enough, smart enough, pretty enough, pure enough, unique enough, free enough, comfortable enough, challenging enough, thoughtful enough. Not enough. Well, ENOUGH!
I break any lies that linger there. I break the past hauntings that bind into tiny corners of my mind that go unseen. I BREAK any strings that remain attached to who someone once said I was because I AM NOT. I AM enough and I am greater than someone has falsely perceived me while wallowing in their own fear and insecurity.
Ironically, my heart breaks again but for your darkness and for the plague that coils around your spirit because I am FREE! I am free and I am called to greatness and I know my worth. So, those words that you thought could hold me down or keep me where I was forever are BROKEN now and trampled upon like the pure defecation it was. Decomposed into the earth where it will and has TRANSFORMED!
Slowly, but surely, over time refined in the mud and soils, washed with rain and life planted, it grows. It grows into something so lovely and breathtaking. New green life springs from the soil. What once were wasteful words and bloody wounds are freshly budding. Freedom reigns and the lies do not hold me any longer. I am with God, and I reach for Him, not alone but with Him. I in Him, and He in me. Together with my God.
Behold, I make ALL THINGS NEW!
The Power of a Word
The power of a word.
You bring literal life and death with your actions. Deeper still. You bring death with your prideful, seemingly innocuous words of my worth. They ensnare and catch in the corners of my soul and as I hear them my breath catches. You are so long gone but the death was still lingering in places and spaces I didn’t think to search for cleansing. I just knew I was this way. Until someone opened my soul. Split right into my heart, bleeding wounds, gushing, internally lost and outwardly straying and groping for saving.
You found me, lifeless in my despair. In places I’d not recalled, you named my demons and put them in the dust. You took my wounds and you left them bare to expose the lies and the depth they been cut into. Then you restored me to your call. You lifted my head up and carried my feet into freedom. Toward rest and renewal, you lifted me to a place of your calling and sang songs of life over my heart. Holy, loved, beloved, cherished, royalty, FREE! My worth is on your lips. You call me and I will follow you anywhere. Restorer. You make ALL things new.
Lord, may we all be free of the lies that bind us. May we discover the hidden places where these lies ensnare and be cleaned of our wounds. Amen.